Turning lead into gold

I haven't posted in ages. I've been too busy with my writing career, primary career, spiritual work, and lots of crazy events surrounding any and all of the above. Most of my activity has been around HI these days and its local events/members.

Hence why I was not only surprised but deeply touched when I found myself nominated and later declared winner of the AOTSC.TDC HPF Hellenic Pagan Community Service Award.

Stunned wouldn't quite cover my reaction. I don't think I've gotten a single award or any sort of formal recognition from the moment I first started HP. I never really expected one. Heck, I didn't even know that they existed.

I left the majority of my participation online mostly due to politics, burnout, and the feeling that nothing I did went noticed or even mattered. Aside from people in HI and my occasional posts to some of the lists, I'm fairly quiet these days. Unless you knew me locally you wouldn't know I've been up to much as of late.

I'm...extremely touched, amazed, and more than a tad humbled...that anyone saw fit to nominate me, that anyone appreciated any of the work I've done.... I wouldn't know where to begin. Especially when I'm the most inactive and unnoticed from the online community as I've ever been. Beyond HI and doing local stuff, I haven't done very much recently. I can't recall the last time I updated my websites, but I get asked about them all of the time. It's odd that I got noticed somehow when I did everything possible over the past few years to not be noticed--quite delibrately, in fact.

Anyhow...to whoever did, thanks. I deeply appreciate it. It means a lot to me.

From http://alostrael.livejournal.com/357444.html and many posts on my friends list, and no, I will not LJ cut it.

Call it a tribute to the goddesses or what-have-you:


I'm really tired of making this post.

For all y'all who thought, "Well, I'll do something when it becomes official," it has become official, and it is time to get off your fucking ass:

The Bush administration officially proposes conscience rule for doctors who don't want to do their fucking jobs.

This does not just apply to doctors -- surgeons, anesthesiologists, etc. -- but to anyone involved. Nurses, equipment wranglers, the dude who monitors the machine that goes "bing!", anyone. Anyone could walk away at any time from a woman who is simply trying to live her life the way she thinks most wise.

Clinics that receive government funds would have to abide by this rule, and could not fire someone for not doing their job, even if they are the only person in a hundred miles who could do it. Even if it is the only abortion-providing facility in the state.

There are no provisions for assisting women who have been denied -- none. No statement that a doctor must help the woman find another doctor who will help her. No offers to help with transportation, should a woman need to go to a different city to get help. Nothing. We get nothing. We are their patients and we are not only being put behind our employees' consciences, we are being left with nothing as recourse.

"Nothing in the new regulation in any way changes a patient's right to any legal procedure," [Health and Human Services Secretary Michael Leavitt] said, noting that a patient could go to another provider.

No, you fucking idiot, it doesn't change my right to do it, but it is going to mean that thousands upon thousands of women are not going to be able to do it.

You don't have to make a thing illegal to make it impossible to fucking get, and that is the effect this is going to have. That should scare the shit out of every single one of you who values their ability to do as they wish with their bodies.

This is the rule. Not the draft, the actual rule that will go into effect if we do not act to stop it and act now.

The rule goes into effect in 30 days.

We have one month to stop this.

Do something.

Planned Parenthood is fighting this as hard as they can. Make a donation here.

Write to your legislator, telling them you oppose the rule, and asking them to fight it.

Transcript for those who can't see the image:

Female pagan says to the male pagan: "Could you please keep the music down when I'm meditating...

...it's weird when Mariah Carey's voice comes from Apollo's mouth."

See Paris Hilton Responds to McCain Ad and more funny videos on FunnyOrDie.com

There is a threat afoot by a far more vicious and sinister enemy than bad slash!fic disguised as satire, and that is... The Neopagan Agenda!

That's right, folks! The Neopagan Agenda is a threat to us all. Those Neopagans are stealing our words, our gods, our practices, and worse yet, our very SOULS!

The Neopagan Agenda is insidious and subtle. First they'll post to our forums demanding to be let into our sacred spheres of Pure Reconstructionism™. Then they demand to be recognized as HELLENISTS! What gall! What utter, utter gal! Those granola-humping, tree-hugging, solstice-honoring, magick-practicing HIPPIES have NO RIGHT TO WORSHIP THE GREEK GODS!!!!!!111

I've had enough of their Agenda--and you should, too! I hear that they're organizing en masse to steal our beloved Hellenismos from us and are forming a coalition. For what purpose? So that others will actually BELIEVE that good, pious Hellenists would actually create religious practices beyond the texts of such noble and esteemed academics such as Burkert, Dodds, and Otto and have gone as far as to READ THE WORKS OF THE ANCIENTS! That's right, they're poisoning their minds and others with Plutarch, Herodotus, and and Plato! What's next, using another calendar besides the ancient Athenian one?

The Neopagan Agenda is a miasma to our community! It is impious and un-Hellenic!


This message was brought to you by People Who Do Not Suck And Hate Granola And Cut Down Trees And Kill Small Furry Animals To Honor the Gods.

This is an example of seriously over the top satire written about members of the Hellenic community, and I'm happy to say that we (myself and various others in the Hellenic community) are far, far too mature for this.

I am sharing only because I really think people should know that this sorta stuff is being written, and this is an example of a level we really shouldn't be stooping to.

I am not saying where I found it posted because I'm above that sort of thing. I am not one to be a tattletale.


( Mildly not work safe )

You're so vain!

You probably think this post is about you, you're so vaaiiinnn....

You probably think this post is about you, don't you, don't you....

[11:03] NecessaryTrout: I don't know.
[11:04] Pythia777: I don't know either. Go fish?
[11:04] NecessaryTrout: Your losing me what are you talking about what don't you know
[11:05] Pythia777: A trout. Is it not the highest form of existence? I do not know.

How did I manage to get sucked into the whole "is magick Hellenic" conversations yet again?

Is it because tonight is the dark moon? Because we have an eclipse soon? Because clearly I'm not being entertained enough on other emailing lists? I can has a more amusing Intarwebs, y/y?

Maybe it's the mystique, the sheer art of it all, the je ne sais quoi, the whole question of whether or not magick is de rigeur in Hellenismos or perhaps it's that whole "Omgs! I don't want to be lumped in with the neo-pagans/Wiccans/witches/uncool-kids-who-sit-in-the-front-of-the-bus!!!!!111eleventy-one" crap which I find to be so embarrassingly passé.

I'd make paper airplanes loaded with spitballs and fire them away at these people, but I really don't want to get after-school detention.



So, um, about those um, Greek gods. Um, yeah. They're like wicked cool an' stuff. Yeah.

It's official. I'll be giving a presentation at Pagan Pride Day with Brontosproximo and Jessi on Hercules Invictus.

The event's in eastern MA.

http://www.easternmasspaganpride.org

I think it's hard not to think of Apollo when it gets to be the summertime. Especially when the weather is mid-90s, sunny, and HUMID as hell.

I do a lot of informal spiritual rituals to the gods on a regular basis, but don't do an awful lot in the way of formals one and haven't in a while. I developed a severe allergy to them after the drama-filled events with a group I used to belong to, and I haven't been able to enjoy them since. Try as I might to have new ideas, I think I just like simplicity.

It's more than obvious to me however that I owe a few deities a serious offering rite as a thank-you. Two of those deities are not patrons, but I had asked them for a favor a while back and nine months later it was granted--in spades. Although its serious, long term reprocussions have yet to be determined and are still underway, I need to thank them for what I have so far because I'm damned grateful.

I don't like doing blind ritual for the sake of doing blind ritual. But I do enjoy having a sense of rhythm, for offering thanks and accepting blessings, and doing things that are a part of day to day life versus having to remove myself from it. Maybe that's why I don't do a lot in the way of formal ritual except to invoke and thank them when I do spiritual and magickal work--I'd much rather have them be a part of my day to day life versus having to remove myself from it in order to do a ritual for them. In some ways, I see such a removal as being dysfunctional, at least for myself. The gods don't stop being around, nor do they stop being in my life when I am at work, in heavy traffic, at yoga class, et cetera.

Just some rambling thoughts for today.

Hilarious.

It's funny. Most of people who run around screaming negative stuff about HI actually have NO clue what we're about.

- They don't know we have ordained priests in the faith who perform weddings and religious ceremonies
- They don't know we have local groups who gather together for ceremonies, libations, and various events
- They have no clue that we do charitable acts in the name of the gods
- They have no idea that we have various orders devoted to specific gods, their worship, and mystical and spiritual practices surrounding them
- They have zero clue that we have outreach programs running and in the works
- They don't know that we engage in fitness programs keeping arete in mind (Olympics, anyone?)
- They have no idea that we're recognized by state and federal governments as a legitimate religious organization.

In short...they don't really know anything. :)

But that's okay. HI and Spira are the only Hellenic orgs I respect these days. The rest I feel either indifference for, or contempt.

I just don't have the time to spend arguing on the Internet and acting as PR in the Hellenic community for Everyone Who Actually Does Shit. In truth, I'm too busy Doing Shit.

What a concept. :)

Consider this post to be the only time I'll comment on this, and I'll just link to it whenever someone else decides to leave anonymous posts in my LJ whining about this or that. I'll even add it to memories.

Dear Pixelated Looney-Toon,


No, I will not worship you in your self-created hero cult. I'm too busy worshipping Apollo by drinking bay leaf tea while performing tarot readings in his honor--on a four legged chair, no less. Or sometimes while seated on a floor with NO CHASM BENEATH ME. This makes me ineligible to worship you, and leaves me rather thankful at that. The day I will worship a human being is the day I leave Hellenism for Catholicism, sell my house and all of my possessions, and quit my job to join the circus. I'd much rather stick to my AIM nicks like "Pythia777" so people like you can rant about how you won't let me join your self-created hero cult so I can worship you and make statues in your honor and offerings and shit. Because clearly *I'M* the crazy one for performing tarot readings and worshipping gods instead of people and for not starting hero cults for myself.

Yes, crazy! Batshit! I am a LUUUUUNATIC! %-) O_o :-O

dingledangledonglelipitytoota!


Nothing but pure purple prose and passionately poignant agape for you,
Kyrene "Pythia777" Ariadne

PS The tarot cards have DRAGONS on them. You know, winged serpents.
PPS I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry.

Oh btw has anyone read "Greek Gods Behaving Badly"? I'm thinking of picking it up. After the usual suspects whined and the people whose senses of humor more greatly attuned were snickering, I feel that I must read this fabulous work of art.

I have nothing new to report, except that the majority of my encounters with Greek deities these days in regards to life's influences and all that appear to be mostly Hermes and Hekate these days. I REALLY like Hekate. I need to spend more time communing with her.

I've also been involved in a number of small to medium local HI events, including a very well done wedding performed by one of our members. It's nice to hang out with people and do Greek stuff from time to time. I only wish I could get over my desire to be solitary. I think that dealing with Hellenic drama for 10+ years completely burnt me out on Hellenic orgs, groups, and what-have-you.

My wish list for the community these days? For some of them to gain the ability to laugh at themselves and not take either themselves or their faith too seriously. I think that they would be able to relax more and enjoy their faith better before they burn out as badly as I did. I think certain individuals are long overdue to lose their minds, crash, or convert to xyz religion.

(PS Yes, I have a sense of humor about myself... and thank the gods for it. It prevents me from caving into that mentality which craves greater creativity and imagination... )

I also feel VERY badly for the people who continue to angst over their connection to this god, that pantheon, this aspect of the religion--all the while getting drawn towards it while kicking and screaming. Why do you hate an aspect of yourself so much as to give yourself much undeserved drama?

This is why I abandoned dogma ages ago--it kills my soul. :P And I've seen what it does to others, and it's never positive. Anyhow, I've long felt that while Apollo's motto is "know thyself" and Dionysos is clearly "be thyself" I think Hermes' is "understand thyself".

Meanwhile, I am WAY overdue on my Order of Hekate of HI homework and Spira stuff. The job search and change took a lot out of me, and an entire month has come and gone. I've gotten NO book edits done. I have, however, done quite a bit on getting back into a nice health program for myself, including eating better and doing yoga almost daily--plus have been meditating every night which is wonderful.

Today I run off to VT to a funeral which is being held early tomorrow morning. It's not going to be fun and I think there'll be a lot of drinking afterwards. But I'm Irish and it needs to be done.

[23:58] InbredSalmon: Cats are cute, don't you think? ^_^
[23:58] Pythia777: w00t! w00t! Cats are cute. ^_^
[23:59] InbredSalmon: who's this?
[23:59] Pythia777: you're a salmon! I'm a salmon. :D
[23:59] Pythia777: actually we've both been played by a bot. this is the second time tonight this has happened to me.
[23:59] Pythia777: you're on lj aren't you?
[23:59] InbredSalmon: yes
[00:00] Pythia777: there ya go!
[00:00] Pythia777: http://community.livejournal.com/themissinghat/profile
[00:00] Pythia777: I see your nick as "InbredSalmon"
[00:00] Pythia777: I bet you see the same o fme
[00:00] Pythia777: *of me
[00:00] InbredSalmon: yes
[00:00] Pythia777: check out that community it explains it all
[00:00] Pythia777: it's a harmless bot, sometimes humorous
[00:00] InbredSalmon: interesting
[00:00] Pythia777: it connects random people who post to lj and have an AIM nick in their profile
[00:01] InbredSalmon: i see

I just read all of my past entries on here. Wow, was I burnt out. I am glad that I got removed from everything in regards to the Hellenic community for a time because I frankly needed it and a little perspective. Of course I had both good and bad incentives along the way to get myself removed, but hey--such is life.

So...the question is...what have I been up to?

Fantastic question. Allow me to bullet point in no particular order:

( Cut for length... )

Can I be honest? I'm the happiest I've been in a LONG time. I finally know where I'm going and where I'd like to go--and where I feel that I would best accomplish my True Will, which being that it is aligned with that of my gods' Will is ultimately where I belong.

So I'm okay. I'd like to start having thoughts in here on my spiritual practice, the gods, my mystical life and where that is all going. I don't expect to be hugely open about some things as it's too personal to share, but I'll try to share what I can.

[22:38] InbredSalmon: Cats are cute, don't you think? ^_^
[22:39] Pythia777: yes
[22:39] InbredSalmon: who is this?
[22:39] Pythia777: I dunno, you IMed me :)
[22:39] InbredSalmon: no i didnt
[22:39] Pythia777: LOL this is one of those IM bot things isn't it?
[22:40] InbredSalmon: no its a real person and i want to know who this is
[22:40] Pythia777: this is what I see on my end:
[22:40] Pythia777: [22:38] InbredSalmon: Cats are cute, don't you think? ^_^
[22:39] Pythia777: yes
[22:40] InbredSalmon: thats not me
[22:40] Pythia777: followed by:
[22:40] Pythia777: [22:39] InbredSalmon: who is this?
[22:39] Pythia777: I dunno, you IMed me :)
[22:39] InbredSalmon: no i didnt

me: yeah you're definitely buzzed... say what about Boston? are you gonna answer that or not?
lorelejade: What about Boston?
me: "So, how do you like the idea that there's a geologic tributary fault stressing the area north of Boston?"
10:27 PM lorelejade: Oh. Yeah. I had my Geography class this past semester.
During it, he mentioned that although seismic activity happens mostly along plate boundaries, tributary faults are something to look out for, since they are stresses that are not so predictable, or even expected.
There's one going through the places in my latest entry.
10:28 PM Actually, Oregon is on a plate rift, so it's really the most dangerous. Eugene, Oregon, technically.
me: gotcha
lorelejade: Look, you'll get to be the Pythia who uncovers a geologic fault and then inhales some great gases, and starts being the Oracle.
10:29 PM me: snerk

Just uber busy. :) It's been ages since I updated here, and I've been slowly coming out of my shell and back into groups like HI and whatnot.

What is everyone up to these days?

Every once in a while I get the mad, insane urge to create a modern day Hellenic mystical tradition. I think of how, given my background in studying and/or practicing in various modern day mystery schools and mystical practices, this could be doable. Could lead to things like Hellenic mystery schools down the road, even.

Then I remember the following:

1) Me creating such a trad alone is a recipe for disaster
2) Me creating ANYTHING in the Hellenic community is just asking to rebuild the pedestal and crank it up a few feet
3) Me with my schedule and life probably wouldn't have as much time to this as I would like

#3 would be solved by #1. #2 is inevitable. I can't sneeze without #2 happening.

I have ideas for a mystical tradition for Apollo. It involves a syncretic approach and is flexible in regards to training. It goes something like this: the goal would be union with an ideal, namely that of balance. How does one achieve that balance and where would that balance be reflected? Well, there's mind-body balance, energy balance, balance between yourself and the world around you, et cetera.

Here are the spheres along with suggested ideas for implementing each:

Mind-body: exercise programs, yoga, certain forms of meditation
Energy balance: Tai Chi, Reiki
Balance between yourself and the world around you: meditation, contemplation--specifically what they call "contemplative prayer"

Add in a healthy dose of Pythgorean and Neoplatonic philosophy and I think we have something here.

This is all shit I'm thinking about creating and implementing within the Inner Circle of the Order of Apollo. The more *original* practices such as various rituals, forms of meditation, et cetera we can come up with over the long run, the better. The idea is to learn what works in the spirit of attaining what we want and then as time goes on, be able to tailor it more specifically towards Apollo--and of course, be able to have something concrete to teach others.

Some practices, however, stand perfectly fine on their own. There is utterly no reason to create a "Hellenic" version of Tai Chi. Tai Chi is Tai Chi, period. I can see, however, eventually starting up an energy healing tradition devoted specifically towards consecrating yourself as a healer of Apollo and attuning yourself to that energy.

Things like this are why I am dangerous and need to stick to just writing vampire pr0n.

Greek pagans in Greece honor the solstice on behalf of Apollo

Here, let me sneak in one of my usual rants in here... why the fuck are some people WHINING about this? "Waa, they're not doing it the way I want it to be done/believe it should be done/the way it was done in ancient times!" Hello, can we have a LITTLE bit of perspective here?? Our gods are still being worshipped IN GREECE IN THE MODERN DAY! Just a short time ago this was ILLEGAL. Right now, they still have an uphill battle with public opinion and the Greek Orthodox Church. I am sure that they can get fired from their jobs and lose their families for participating in said ritual. I'm sure that many of them being Greek themselves are more concerned with honoring the gods than doing it "right". Probably their way of "right" is just honoring the gods however way they can--and want to, for that matter.

And ya know what? That sounds pretty sane to me. I see nothing wrong in their rituals; they're not claiming Apollo is a space alien or asking him to bless crystals on their necklaces or anything so outlandish that it would neither make sense nor make them look vaguely sane.

Perspective, people. Let's just be happy about the positive press and that our fellow brethren in Greece are worshipping the gods instead of nitpicking on the little details. I know that we as a community have grown WAY too used to nitpicking; putting these sort of rituals on display is like writing essays and having a bunch of English majors read them. I think it's a habit we can stand to break.

I think I need to revive that community sanegreekrecons. Really.

I'm alive, really. Finally wrapped up my project from hell at work plus my manuscript for publication (nothing Greek religion related, sorry... but the main char is a devotee of Apollo lol). Then there was that twenty page paper I had to write for some Golden Dawn work I'm doing....

I performed a libation for Apollo this weekend on behalf of the summer solstice which was lovely. Also got to do a nice ritual with other members of the Order of Ares.

I also prayed to Dionysos this weekend regarding some personal issues. This had interesting results. I need to rephrase my request to him tonight before my life gets any more interesting.

And gods know... my life's already interesting enough. :/

*cackle*

This userpic by newdance is filled with awesome:

This whole incident with the books and all reminds me of why I nearly left the Hellenic community for good, and I'm once again questioning why I came back and didn't stay gone.

Basically it comes down to this:

1) I had a lot of people who put me up on a pedestal
2) I had a lot of people who resented me being put up on a pedestal
3) I had a lot of people who resented the people who resented me being put on a pedestal
4) I had a lot of people whom I thought were friends that in actuality just got an ego kick from being my friend, and quickly turned into bitter enemies when they couldn't share the pedestal or quickly discovered that I am in fact human and not whatever strange personage they projected upon me.

I never wanted to be up on a pedestal to begin with. All I had wanted to do from the start was find others like myself who worshipped the Greek gods, and start a "church" for ourselves, for the lack of a better term. It all snowballed from there.

None of the original founders of Hellenion or the veterans of the Hellenic community are around anymore. I can't say that I blame them for not being around, and with the bad apples in the bunch that we have, I wouldn't blame anyone right now for quitting and leaving, going solitary, or both. I happen to know of numerous solitaries who have avoided being involved in the Hellenic community all because they have watched how others act towards me.

I don't know why some people desire fame; fame sucks and it makes your life utterly miserable. I like having my life to myself. You may notice I never really post about my personal life on here, and there's a reason for that--I used to get stalked and harassed by members of my religious community who were searching for "dirt" for their latest tabloid. Ask me sometime about how a vampire online RPG based on a book I have coming out (yes, actually published and not self-published, either!) turned into "Kyrene thinks she's a 200 year old vampire, an Avatar of Apollo, and 'the' Pythia," et cetera. I think just from that sentence alone you'll get what I mean.

Somewhere along the way, I met genuine friends in the community who neither put me up on a pedestal nor resented me because others kept putting me up on one. I had the opportunity to get in touch tonight with a former member of this community--namely, Drew--and we did a quick catching up in the midst of my apologizing for him getting in the middle of this bullshit high school drama. It was a good thing, and like I said in the last post, I wish that it had been under better circumstances.

For people like him who have remained in this community, I have stuck around and tried to find corners of this place worth being involved in. Thus far to my knowledge, Hercules Invictus, Spira, and Dadoukhoi are the only non-drama inducing and generally all round good Hellenic orgs online and off that I have been involved with so far. I wish I could say that there were more. I wish we had more leaders and less followers. But truth be told, we are VERY small and of course are not going to have a lot in the way of varieties and flavors of organizations which have not been poisoned thus far by a bunch of tiara-seeking, histrionic sycophants.

I've been begged on and off again to start another org and I can't help but think to myself, "Why would I want to undergo that torture AGAIN?" I put up with enough shit right now; why put myself back into the spotlight? I gave it up for good reasons. I gave up my religious NAME to get away from all of that shit, from everything that people associated with me as Kyrene, and the whole nine yards.

I don't want to change who I am for these drama-seeking irritants, and I don't want to give up who I am for them, either. It always seems to me that one decision after another in regards to my identity in the religious community has been influenced in some way, shape or form by others in the community--and it shouldn't be. It should be influenced by the nudgings of my gods and my Agathos Daimon who sometimes masks himself as my inner voice of wisdom.

Sometimes it's hard to hear that voice over the noise of the drama, and when I can't hear that voice, I can't be who I truly am. I can only be someone who simply reacts to people around her under such circumstances, and I am not that person.

At some point I need to just sit down with myself and realize that yes, I'm hurt and still hurting. I've been hurt by too many people whom I have long realized only liked the person whom they wanted me to be and not who I really am. I have a list of names in my head who have disappointed, hurt, and even verbally abused me and in spite of my repeated attempts to reconcile continued to fire their venom.

I have no one to blame but myself if I continue to hang onto that, and only myself to blame if I wind up in that situation again as their continued enabler for their own personal drama and petty bullshit. It gives them a power they do not deserve, and in the end, I am no one's person but my own.

I think at some point tonight after I go on my eliptical this evening, I will be doing a serious, hardcore invocation to Dionysos tonight. I need to have a nice, good, long chat with him.

Drew actually contacted me back, so apparently Julia actually wasn't lying about that. I'm kinda glad because I missed chatting with the guy--but kinda sad because it's a shame he had to contact me under such circumstances.

Basically, I was right--the books WERE given to the Demos. I did not hallucinate about his intentions. But apparently he had sent a letter to the Prutaneis saying that should the Demos dissolve, the books should either go to another Demos or to the national body.

So, that left me with the following choices:

1) Don't give the books back, and deny Drew's wishes in that regard. I think he's suffered enough bullshit and drama without having to revisit this crap again anymore than he honestly has to, and I didn't want to go there.

2) Give the books to Julia.

3) Give the books to another member. The closest one besides Julia is in PA so that was out of the question.

4) Ship the books to someone. Given there are a couple of hundred, not feasible.

5) Rejoin Hellenion and start a proto-Demos, thus keeping the library in the Hellenion sphere. I sincerely doubt they'd accept my app if I did, so that option was out.

6) Get a friend to get the books off of my hands and give them back to Julia, preferably someone with a truck because I don't have small crates to put them in--only large boxes.


#6 won.

I know that many of you won't be happy by this, given the shit that she gave me and the continued "oathbreaker" and "liar" accusations. I'm doing this for Drew, not her. I happen to like Drew and think he got dragged into enough bullshit politics by dealing with this crap ON TOP OF what he dealt with when he left, so call me a compassionate soul.

It was interesting, thinking about rejoining Hellenion for even a few minutes. I'm not sure I would want to go back, nor if I would have anything to gain. I'd like to eventually reconcile with the people there at some point, but I don't think that they have it in them to do so. Julia clearly has issues of her own, as do a few of them there--and those particular individuals are all in positions of leadership.

Maybe the simplest approach is just to not deal with them at all. Personally, after this incident, I'm happier than ever that I left when I did, and I honestly can't believe that two years later I'm still getting dragged into their bullshit. At the same time, I'm also sad because it's a chapter in my life that I had high hopes for--maybe too high. Maybe I expected too much from the wrong kinds of people.

I am holding a book giveaway of the former Demos Oreiadon Hypatia Memorial library.

Various persons to not be named have laid claim upon these books. Since their ownership is unclear, I open the doors to the former Demos library to the community at large on a first-come first-serve basis to those who either want them or believe that they have a claim to them. Any books left over at the end of the event will be donated to a local bookstore.

The book giveaway will be held on June 2, 2007 at 9:00am at Minuteman National Park in Concord, MA.





I will be posting this announcement on several Hellenic lists shortly.

My reply to her latest email to me, which continues to call me a liar and claims that my contact info has been sent to Drew:

---

Julia,

I'm cc'ing the two others who have sent me your emails, as I'm done
with the secrecy bullshit behind my back.

Julia, you have been welcome for the past TWO YEARS to come by and
take those books, and you never once bothered. Two years is a more
than reasonable length of time, and when you didn't contact me about
them since August 22, 2005 (yes that was the last email exchange about
them), I had assumed that you had lost interest. Now you're
attempting to take them by force by pretending that I have denied your
request. I have ALL of the emails saved of our exchange, with
timestamps, and how I said "Yes, please, take them off my hands!
It'll be more space for me." I can send them to anyone who wishes to
see them for precisely what had occurred two years ago, as now
suddenly I'm an "oathbreaker" and a "liar".

Drew has two weeks to contact me to let me know that he has either
changed his mind about their destination (that they were meant for the
organization Hellenion and not the Demos itself), or I have somehow
misinterpreted his request, or I will be donating all of the books to
a used bookstore. Two weeks at this point after waiting *two years*
for you, Julia, is a more than reasonable length of time. If you are
really in contact with him, please let him know this. Feel free to
pass that information along to the Prutaneis as well, since they are
so concerned about this situation.

---

I am posting this publically because at this point, I have absolutely nothing to hide, and I'm done with her sneaking around with her cowardly threats behind my back. Drew has two weeks to contact me. If he's truly been in touch with her, I welcome renewing our contact as well as showing him all of the emails that took place in '05 in regards to this whole bullshit situation.

I took a trip down memory lane. I no longer post to this LJ for a variety of reasons, but from time to time I contemplate reviving it:

http://kyrene.livejournal.com/688184.html

This post outlines very clearly why I left, and why I would not put it past the current leadership to send me a nasty letter over a bunch of books. :/

There's so much shit I should make public about what I know that went down in the leadership that it's not even funny, and none of it particularly good. It's certainly not the org I founded years ago, not by a long shot. :( And I have yet to hear any encouraging news that it's improved by any stretch of the imagination.

People have asked me since to start up a new organization, and I've been working on Dadoukhoi--albeit in a much different vein, working with the idea of a group that exists to provide and share resources to start off with. Given how long it's taken for us to do just that, I have my extreme doubts about forming anything like another Hellenic org anytime soon. All I'll say is this: if the gods want me to, I'll do so. But I think they have other plans for me these days.

Besides, given how I was treated during and after, would I want to? Dear gods.

My reply to Julia's bullshit. If you're really sick of this drama already, feel free to skip.

( my email... )

Understanding is a three edged sword. Your side, their side and the truth."
- Sheridan in Babylon 5


Fact: Drew Campbell gave me a ton of crates containing books as a donation to start a Demos library back in 2003.

Fact: I was the keeper of said library until the Demos' dissolution back in 2005, and the books have remained and continue to be in my possession.

Fact: I was contacted by a former member of the then-and-now defunct Demos asking to have some of the books.

Fact: I replied in return that I was in the process of moving and since I don't have enough space for all of them as far as shelving, they were welcome to pick up a box or two for themselves if they so desired.

Fact: Said individual never came.

Fact: People whom I knew produced emails from said individual which were essentially stabbing me in the back and talking negatively about me without bringing it to me personally.

Fact: I quietly dissolved contact with said individual, figuring that it was that person's loss anyway.

Fact: Almost two years later, said individual is now running around behind my back claiming that I "stole" the books, is calling me an oathbreaker, has invoked Themis against me and is claiming that she will have me arrested.

Fact: This person is a former President of Hellenion.

Fact: I have not received one email from this individual this whole time, and have heard about all of these accusations from the forwarded emails which have been received by me from people whom I know both online and off, swearing all sorts of legalities against me for not giving to her books which a) she has no legal claim over and b) were meant to be gifts to begin with.

Fact: I am sick to death of histrionic sycophants masquerading as good people in this community. You want the books, Julia? You contact me personally so I can tell you off face to face about what a two-faced scumbag you are. But as always, you never have the guts for confrontation. You are all talk, you with your accusations of "oathbreaking." By Apollo, I have sworn no oaths to you, sweetheart. I have, however, sworn an oath to be virtuous and compassionate at all times. I can easily turn around and sue you for character defamation, but I won't. I am a bigger person than that.

Edit: It gets better. According to her, Hellenion AND Drew will be sending me a letter with the legal threat enclosed.

Best post to come out of the stupidity on HP EVER:


Olympian Hotline: Thank you for connecting to the olympian hotline.
For Apollo, Press 7....For Artemis Press 6....For Zeus Press 1.....

RavenDreamer: [Presses 1]

Olympian Hotline: You have selected 1: Zeus. All hail he who bears the
stormcloud! To further assist you in getting the right Zeus (as we
have many), please listed to the following selection. If you would
prefer Classic Zeus, Press 1.....If you would prefer instead the New
Zeus...Press 2....If you would prefer Diet Zeus...Press 3...
( more... )

I feel so blah! it's so not fair that I have this morning off but nobody wants to do anything :-(. I'll just sit home alone and write poems about death.

Oh and I went to gaming group with ravenhorse the other day but wordcandlemage is getting favors from the game master. I'm never gaming with them again!

What sucks is that everybody has asked why I'm leaving the furry fandom but the answer is simple: Some of you know who you are and why I'm leaving FOREVAR.

This entry automatically generated by the LJ Drama Generator!

This is how I feel about HellenicPagan right now:



Yanked from cat_macros here.

If it's good enough for HellenicPagan, it's good enough for my Livejournal.

( Whereupon I endeavor to explain to someone what a crisis of faith actually is... )

Fine, gods, I give up.

I'm Kyrene.

:P

From ravendreamer on how to consult an Oracle:

...simply consult an ORACLE database! Its so simple:

SELECT * FROM DIVINE_WILL WHERE ANSWER='FAVORABLE' AND SMITING='NO'

No new things for Hellenists! The ancients found them scary and therefore so must we. After all we should model ourselves after them in order to be good Hellenists and not incur the wrath of the gods!

No more Livejournal, emailing lists, or computers for us. Or you're not a real reconstructionist. And you risk the wrath of the gods.

Just remember to say NO to the wrath of the gods! Ban all new things!!

Courtesy of ravendreamer, I give you...the Hellenic community in VB.NET!


do until EndOfTime=true
Neopagan.Assert(not Culture=Worship)
MessageBox.Show(Recon.BitterComplaints.bcNeopagansAreStupid,vbOk)
Neopagan.Snerk(snSarcasm)

lintAmazinglyBigInt=Recons.AttemptedRebuttals
loop

From brontosproximo:

Good day all. This note is an informal invitation for those
interested in joining the Order of Ares.

The Order of Ares shall be devoted to understanding the nature of
conflict and development of warriors.

The purpose of the Order is not to encourage or glorify war, but
develop and honor warriors.

The Order of Ares is open to
-students of any martial art studying with an accredited teacher
-veterans of any country
-active service members of any country.
-counseling professionals

Please email me directly for more details or to request an exception
to the prerequisites.

ATTN TO THOSE WHO INDICATED AN INTEREST

I've created private lists versus using the public lists--although I think it'd be great to use the public lists in order to find people interested in the groups.

If you are still interested, please email me and I'll send you an invite: pythia.hiereia (at) gmail (dot) com

Here's something that came up from the previous topic I just posted which bears mentioning:

How do we as Hellenists provide outlets, resources, and spiritual solace for people undergoing rites of passage or a death in the family? Back in the day we had the Eleusinian Mysteries. I am wondering if we need something similar.

When my grandfather died over a year ago, I had nothing. There was nothing in modern day Hellenismos that offered any help, comfort, or spiritual aid. I wound up turning to Eastern philosophy and its texts for answers which I found lacking in modern day Hellenismos and feeling abandoned by a faith I thought would help me in times like that. I'd like that to not happen to others down the road, especially since I know of people already who have left Hellenismos for same or similar reasons.

One of the biggest attractors to Christianity from Hellenismos back when it began was the comfort in a beautiful life after death for people other than just the initiated. One of the strongest attractors today to Buddhism is that you can deal with your own death and actually prepare for it in a meditative way--just read the Bardo sometime.

These are things which occupied my thoughts for a very long, agonizing six months. Religion is supposed to offer solutions to these things. If they don't, they are missing a major function for which they are often held responsible.

The words "We can't offer the mysteries in the modern day because we can't know them/won't know them/shouldn't do them/would be hubris/the gods would strike us dead" are bullshit in the hearts and minds of people undergoing genuine life trauma due to its passages and passing of ones dear to us, spiritual transformation and transformation in the Dark Nights of their souls, and people who desire more than just offering incense and libations.

Thoughts?

Interesting conversation with a few people in private email begs this question:

For those in the Hellenic community or Hellenists in general: what sorts of things do you think we need to focus on in order to ensure that our traditions pass on to the next generations? What is important to pass down, get done, or otherwise leave behind?

I guess Apollo hacked into my WoW tonight:

Really now, can I be honest? I don't hate people. I don't even comprehend what it's like to hate someone. I'm not even certain what goes into the psychology of hating people, let alone how to comprehend it. I get exasperated or disgusted with the way people behave and the things they say, but I don't hate people.

In short...you're just not special. But just because I don't hate you doesn't mean that you're a bad person...or something. I just don't see you or anyone as worth hating.

Maybe I'm just a freak that way.

Some days I wonder how many people have emotionally evolved since high school. And I find the numbers depressingly low. It's awful.

All in all, I'm a social butterfly but some days I just wanna unplug from email, LJ, and message boards and just play World of Warcraft. World of Warcraft is FUN. It involves killing things, going on quests, and all sorts of RPG goodness! I wish my life had more of World of Warcraft in it. And writing. And cuddling my kitties.

I'm going to write a book on spirituality one of these days. Maybe I'll include the following message in my dedication: "Just because you weren't mentioned, doesn't mean that I did it delibrately because I like hate you and want you to turn orange and have your head fall off at an awkward moment!" Do I need such disclaimers now?

Bonus points if you know what I paraphrased in that statement and where it came from.

You're so vain,
You probably think this post is about you,
You're so vain,
You probably think this post is about you, don't you, don't you?

Apparently there are people in the community who believe that this site is only managed by one or two individuals and only what THEY want to put up there and promote. This is why, obviously, the site has been dormant for so long.

The site was meant as a resource for EVERYONE to contribute to. You have a resource that's not up there? Put it up! A link, a book, anything! It's not a political site, it's not affiliated with any org, and the whole purpose of Dadoukhoi is to be a non-affiliated group open to ALL organizations, ALL types of Hellenists, et cetera.


Here's the link:

http://dadoukhoi.proboards107.com/index.cgi